The Invisible Mother

Author Unknown

It all began to make sense, the blank stares, the lack of response, the way one of the kids will walk into the room while I'm on the phone and ask to be taken to the store. Inside I'm thinking, 'Can't you see I'm on the phone?'

Obviously not; no one can see if I'm on the phone, or cooking, or sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner, because no one can see me at all.  I'm invisible. The invisible Mom.  Some days I am only a pair of hands, nothing more:  Can you fix this?  Can you tie this? Can you open this?

Some days I'm not a pair of hands; I'm not even a human being. I'm a clock to ask, 'What time is it?'  I'm a satellite guide to answer, 'What number is the Disney Channel?'  I'm a car to order, 'Right around 5:30, please.'

I was certain that these were the hands that once held books and the eyes that studied history and the mind that graduated summa cum laude--but now they had disappeared into the peanut butter, never to be seen again.

She's going, she's going, she's gone!

One night, a group of us were having dinner, celebrating the return of a friend from England.  Janice had just gotten back from a fabulous trip, and she was going on and on about the hotel she stayed in. I was sitting there, looking around at the others all put together so well.  It was hard not to compare and feel sorry for myself.  I was feeling pretty pathetic, when Janice turned to me with a beautifully wrapped package, and said, 'I brought you this.'  It was a book on the great cathedrals of Europe. I wasn't exactly sure why she'd given it to me until I read her inscription:

'To Charlotte, with admiration for the greatness of what you are building when no one sees.'

In the days ahead I would read--no, devour--the book.  And I would discover what would become for me, four life-changing truths, after which I could pattern my work:  No one can say who built the great cathedrals--we have no record of their names.  These builders gave their whole lives for a work they would never see finished.  They made great sacrifices and expected no credit.  The passion of their building was fueled by their faith that the eyes of God saw everything.

A legendary story in the book told of a rich man who came to visit the cathedral while it was being built, and he saw a workman carving a tiny bird on the inside of a beam. He was puzzled and asked the man, 'Why are you spending so much time carving that bird into a beam that will be covered by the roof? No one will ever see it.'  And the workman replied, 'Because God sees.'

I closed the book, feeling the missing piece fall into place.  It was almost as if I heard God whispering to me, 'I see you, Charlotte.  I see the sacrifices you make every day, even when no one around you does.  No act of kindness you've done, no sequin you've sewn on, no cupcake you've baked, is too small for me to notice and smile over.  You are building a great cathedral, but you can't see right now what it will become.'

At times, my invisibility feels like an affliction.  But it is not a disease that is erasing my life.  It is the cure for the disease of my own self-centeredness. It is the antidote to my strong, stubborn pride.

I keep the right perspective when I see myself as a great builder.  As one of the people who show up at a job that they will never see finished, to work on something that their name will never be on.  The writer of the book went so far as to say that no cathedrals could ever be built in our lifetime because there are so few people willing to sacrifice to that degree.

When I really think about it, I don't want my son to tell the friend he's bringing home from college for Thanksgiving, 'My Mom gets up at 4:00 in the morning and bakes homemade pies, and then she hand bastes a turkey for three hours and presses all the linens for the table.'  That would mean I'd built a shrine or a monument to myself.  I just want him to want to come home.

And then, if there is anything more to say to his friend, to add, 'You're gonna love it there.'

As mothers, we are building great cathedrals.  We cannot be seen if we're doing it right.  And one day, it is very possible that the world will marvel, not only at what we have built, but at the beauty that has been added to the world by the sacrifices of invisible women.

Well done Mother!

Idolatrous prayer?

She asked the question just before we went to bed last night. 

"Where in the Bible can I find a verse on idolatory?"
"There are lots" her father answered.
"The first one is probably the one in the 10 commandments" I added.

This morning in the car she told me that it is her turn to open the school today with scripture and prayer.  And that she was going to talk about idolatry.  She carried on before I could ask for more information.

"Many times we are so absorbed about something that we end up praying only about that one thing.  Like sport for instance.  We pray that we will do well.  We pray that we will not be injured.  We pray to win the game.  At the end, the only thing you talk about in prayer is your sport.  That is idolatry.  We should grow in our relationship with God in our prayer time instead of petitioning Him about our idolatrous activities".

Deep words for a teenager.

Food for thought.

The danger of social media - read this story and read it to your children.

After tossing her books on the sofa, she decided to grab a snack and get on-line..
She logged on under her screen name ByAngel213. She checked her Buddy List and saw GoTo123 was on. She sent him an instant message:

ByAngel213:
Hi. I'm glad you are on! I thought someone was following me home today. It was really weird!
GoTo123:
LOL You watch too much TV. Why would someone be following you? Don't you live in a safe neighbourhood?
ByAngel213:
Of course I do. LOL I guess it was my imagination cuz' I didn't see anybody when I looked out.
GoTo123:
Unless you gave your name out on-line. You haven't done that have you?
ByAngel213:
Of course not. I'm not stupid you know.
GoTo123:
Did you have a softball game after school today?
ByAngel213:
Yes, and we won!!
GoTo123:
That's great! Who did you play?
ByAngel213:
We played the Hornets. LOL.
Their uniforms are so gross! They look like bees. LOL
GoTo123:
What is your team called?
ByAngel213:
We are the Canton Cats. We have tiger paws on our uniforms. They are
really cool.
GoTo123:
Did you pitch?
ByAngel213:
No, I play second base. I got to go. My homework has to be done before my 
parents get home. I don't want them mad at me. Bye!
GoTo123:
Catch you later. Bye

Meanwhile, GoTo123 went to the member menu and began to search for her profile. When it came up, he highlighted it and printed it out. He took out a pen and began to write down what he knew about Angel so far.

Her name: Shannon
Birthday: Jan. 3, 1985
Age: 13
State where she lived: Victoria

Hobbies: softball, chorus, skating and going to the mall. Besides this information, he knew she lived in Canton because she had just told him. He knew she stayed by herself until 6:30 p.m. every afternoon until her parents came home from work. He knew she played softball on Thursday
afternoons on the school team, and the team was named the Canton Cats. Her favorite number 7 was printed on her jersey. He knew she was in the eighth grade at the Canton Junior High school. She had told him all this in the conversations they had on- line. He had enough information
to find her now.

Shannon didn't tell her parents about the incident on the way home from the ballpark that day. She didn't want them to make a scene and stop her from walking home from the softball games. Parents were always overreacting and hers were the worst. It made her wish she was not an only child. Maybe if she had brothers and sisters, her parents wouldn’t be so overprotective.

By Thursday, Shannon had forgotten about the footsteps following her. Her game was in full swing when suddenly she felt someone staring at her.
 
It was then that the memory came back. She glanced up from her second base position to see a man watching her closely. He was leaning against the fence behind first base and he smiled when she looked at him. He didn't look scary and she quickly dismissed the sudden fear she had felt.

After the game, he sat on a bleacher while she talked to the coach. She noticed his smile once again as she walked past him. He nodded and she smiled back. He noticed her name on the back of her shirt. He knew he had found her.

Quietly, he walked a safe distance behind her. It was only a few blocks to Shannon 's home, and once he saw where she lived he quickly returned to the park to get his car.

Now he had to wait. He decided to get a bite to eat until the time came to go to Shannon 's house. He drove to a fast food restaurant and sat there until time to make his move.

Shannon was in her room later that evening when she heard voices in the living room.

" Shannon , come here," her father called.. He sounded upset and she couldn't imagine why. She went into the room to see the man from the ballpark sitting on the sofa.

 "Sit down," her father began," this man has just told us a most interesting story about you."

Shannon sat back. How could he tell her parents anything? She had never seen him before today!

"Do you know who I am, Shannon ?" the man asked.
"No," Shannon answered.

"I am a police officer and your online friend, GoTo123."

Shannon was stunned. "That's impossible! GoTo123 is a kid my age! He's 14. And he lives in Western Australia!"

The man smiled. "I know I told you all that, but it wasn't true. You see, Shannon , there are people on-line who pretend to be kids; I was one of them. But while others do it to injure kids and hurt them, I belong to a group of parents who do it to protect kids from predators. I came here to find you to teach you how dangerous it is to talk to people on-line.
You told me enough about yourself to make it easy for me to find you. You named the school you went to, the name of your ball team and the position you played. The number and name on your jersey just made finding you a breeze."

Shannon was stunned. "You mean you don't live in Western Australia?"

He laughed. "No, I live in Abbottsford . It made you feel safe to think I was so far away, didn't it?"

She nodded.

"I had a friend whose daughter was like you. Only she wasn't as lucky. The guy found her and murdered her while she was home alone. Kids are taught not to tell anyone when they are alone, yet they do it all the time on-line. The wrong people trick you into giving out information a little here and there on-line. Before you know it, you have told them enough for them to find you without even realizing you have done it. I hope you've learned a lesson from this and won't do it again. Tell others
about this so they will be safe too?"

"It's a promise!"

That night Shannon and her Dad and Mum thanked God for protecting Shannon from what could have been a tragic situation.

Author Unknown.

The Silent Sermon

A member of a certain church, who previously had been attending services regularly, stopped going. After a few weeks, the preacher decided to visit him.

It was a chilly evening. The pastor found the man at home alone, sitting before a blazing fire. Guessing the reason for his preacher's visit, the man welcomed him, led him to a comfortable chair near the fireplace... and waited.

The preacher made himself at home but said nothing.  In the grave silence, he contemplated the dance of the flames around the burning logs.  After some minutes, the preacher took the fire tongs, carefully picked up a brightly burning ember and placed it to one side of the hearth all alone, then he sat back in his chair, still silent. The host watched all this in quiet contemplation.  As the one lone ember's flame flickered and diminished, there was a momentary glow and then its fire was no more  Soon it was cold and dead. Not a word had been spoken since the initial greeting.  The preacher glanced at his watch and realized it was time to leave.  He slowly stood up, picked up the cold, dead ember and placed it back in the middle of the fire.  Immediately it began to glow, once more with the light and warmth of the burning coals around it. As the preacher reached the door to leave, his host said with a tear running down his cheek, 'Thank you so much for your visit and especially for the fiery sermon. I will be back in church next Sunday.' We live in a world today, which tries to say too much with too little.  Consequently, few listen. Sometimes the best sermons are the ones left unspoken. Author Unknown

The ruins of our lives

There are a few odd things I have a special interest in. One of them is the ruin of an old building.

We took a drive down to the Cape this weekend and we drove past several such ruins. I always wonder what the woman was like who wore an apron in that house. How many little feet were running in that house when it was still a home? What happened to them? How many years ago where they there? While I was pondering on questions as this, it occurred to me that our lives are like that ruins.

Our sinful life that we left behind is a ruined building now. No more life there. No roof. No garden. Just an empty space where there once was life. The Bible says in 2 Corinthians 5:17: Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!

Why then is it so difficult for us to walk away from our past?  Why can’t we just forget about the ruin and focus on our new life? 

Firstly, you have to accept the forgiveness available to you.  Jesus died for everything you did wrong in your past and everything you will do wrong in your future.  His blood was enough.  It was the perfect offering.  There is nothing more you can add to it.

Secondly, you have to forgive yourself.  That is the more difficult part.  We all have skeletons in our cupboards and most people will tell you to just forget about them.  I tend to differ.  I will tell you why.  Sometimes, you have to take those skeletons out and look at them with the knowledge and life experience you have now.  Many times you will realise that what you did wrong way back then, was the result of a lack of life experience.  A lack of guidance.  A lack of knowledge.  It makes it easier to forgive yourself for what you did in your past.  If you had the choice today, you wouldn’t do it.

Thirdly, obviously Satan will constantly remind you of your ruin.  He will always try to convince you that your life house still looks that like.  He will try to convince you that you are not worth serving in your church, standing in a ministry, taking part in a cell group or whatever, just because of what you were.  In times like that, you have to remind him of what you are!  You are covered by God’s grace.  Grace is one big word written over your entire past and it covers everything!

The next time you are reminded of your life ruin, focus on this little chorus:

I’ve got a mansion
Right over the hilltop
In that bright land where, we’ll never grow old
And someday yonder
We will never more wonder
But walk on streets that are purest gold.

May God help you today to accept His forgiveness, to forgive yourself and to focus on your new life in Christ!

It is well with my soul

I love this hymn.  Its words have carried me through difficult times many times.  Read the words first and then the history behind the song:

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blest assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

The history behind this song is mind blowing (courtesy of http://biblestudycharts.com/A_Daily_Hymn.html)

This hymn was written by a Chicago lawyer, Horatio G. Spafford. You might think to write a worship song titled, 'It is well with my soul', you would indeed have to be a rich, successful Chicago lawyer. But the words, "When sorrows like sea billows roll ... It is well with my soul”, were not written during the happiest period of  Spafford's life. On the contrary, they came from a man who had suffered almost unimaginable personal tragedy.

Horatio G. Spafford and his wife, Anna, were pretty well-known in 1860’s Chicago. And this was not just because of Horatio's legal career and business endeavors. The Spaffords were also prominent supporters and close friends of D.L. Moody, the famous preacher. In 1870, however, things started to go wrong. The Spaffords' only son was killed by scarlet fever at the age of four. A year later, it was fire rather than fever that struck. Horatio had invested heavily in real estate on the shores of Lake Michigan. In 1871, every one of these holdings was wiped out by the great Chicago Fire.

Aware of the toll that these disasters had taken on the family, Horatio decided to take his wife and four daughters on a holiday to England. And, not only did they need the rest -- DL Moody needed the help. He was traveling around Britain on one of his great evangelistic campaigns. Horatio and Anna planned to join Moody in late 1873. And so, the Spaffords traveled to New York in November, from where they were to catch the French steamer 'Ville de Havre' across the Atlantic. Yet just before they set sail, a last-minute business development forced Horatio to delay. Not wanting to ruin the family holiday, Spafford persuaded his family to go as planned. He would follow on later. With this decided, Anna and her four daughters sailed East to Europe while Spafford returned West to Chicago. Just nine days later, Spafford received a telegram from his wife in Wales. It read: "Saved alone."

On November 2nd 1873, the 'Ville de Havre' had collided with 'The Lochearn', an English vessel. It sank in only 12 minutes, claiming the lives of 226 people. Anna Spafford had stood bravely on the deck, with her daughters Annie, Maggie, Bessie and Tanetta clinging desperately to her. Her last memory had been of her baby being torn violently from her arms by the force of the waters. Anna was only saved from the fate of her daughters by a plank which floated beneath her unconscious body and propped her up. When the survivors of the wreck had been rescued, Mrs. Spafford's first reaction was one of complete despair. Then she heard a voice speak to her, "You were spared for a purpose." And she immediately recalled the words of a friend, "It's easy to be grateful and good when you have so much, but take care that you are not a fair-weather friend to God."

Upon hearing the terrible news, Horatio Spafford boarded the next ship out of New York to join his bereaved wife. Bertha Spafford (the fifth daughter of Horatio and Anna born later) explained that during her father's voyage, the captain of the ship had called him to the bridge. "A careful reckoning has been made", he said, "and I believe we are now passing the place where the de Havre was wrecked. The water is three miles deep." Horatio then returned to his cabin and penned the lyrics of his great hymn.

The words which Spafford wrote that day come from 2 Kings 4:26. They echo the response of the Shunammite woman to the sudden death of her only child. Though we are told "her soul is vexed within her", she still maintains that 'It is well." And Spafford's song reveals a man whose trust in the Lord is as unwavering as hers was.

It would be very difficult for any of us to predict how we would react under circumstances similar to those experienced by the Spaffords. But we do know that the God who sustained them would also be with us.

No matter what circumstances overtake us may we be able to say with Horatio Spafford...

It is well, it is well with my soul!